jbees

May 2, 2022

Red flags

Though I haven't had a terrible experience, I have felt there are quite a few red flags there especially if you're really struggling with your mental health as many people there seem to be. I work in mental health myself and I wrote quite a detailed post about something that I am really struggling with. Unfortunately my first post about the issue I'm struggling with was quite long and as I didn't receive any replies like other new posts, tried to edit it to make it more palatable to read but discovered you can't edit after 5 mins. I also then wrote another post on the thread apologising for the length of it but it now means it doesn't show up in the unanswered threads as my own reply is listed as a reply. I know people can't or don't always want to reply to a post but it can make you feel a bit vulnerable when you've laid your heart out and then also can't edit it and it looks like you've had others reply when you haven't, and all the other new posts are being answered. I then linked to it in another relevant post but again, no replies. I've also noticed that a few of the established members often reply to someone's first post saying welcome etc which is a nice touch in theory but again does make it look like people are getting replies to their problem but actually are just getting a "welcome to the forum" message. For e.g. I saw multiple posts that had been up for at least a few days where someone poured their heart really vulnerably only to then get a reply "welcome to the forum" 🙂 from another member but with no indication the person replying had read the post for e.g. saying something like basically the OP was feeling suicidal or really struggling. it's a bit like telling someone IRL that you're having a terrible time and they ignore that and say "the weather's nice today". A "welcome to the forum, sorry you're having a tough time, I don't have any knowledge of your experience but hopefully someone that does will reply soon" would be better than cheery welcomes that don't acknowledge anything the person has mentioned especially when particularly fragile, it can just make you feel even more invisible and unheard. It was also difficult to work out how to now delete your account. I'm not suicidal or dealing with very severe mental health problems (they're moderate) myself but wouldn't recommend to friends or my own mental health clients as I think the setup doesn't seem very empathetic to the users experience and could be very triggering rather than helpful, as a result. I have responded to quite a few people there in an effort to balance out some questionable, shaming and badly informed replies about mental health from other members but still haven't received support myself. I looked up reviews as a result of my experiences and found similar thoughts here.